April 7, 2011
Summer is coming. No. It is supposed to be summer but it is surprisingly cool. This oddity makes me wonder everyday; why a tropical country in its summer season would give a taste of cool and comforting temperature in times like this.
Though I was being comforted by this kind of temperature, I can’t help but ask. I would say I love this kind of weather; not too hot, not too cold. But I wouldn’t say that somebody else would be pleased.
7:11 pm on the clock and I’m writing this blog. This is completely odd too. This time of the day I must be talking to an online student; giving my best shot to teach him English or in some cases, entertain him and entertain myself. I like doing this for some time. To be exact, I’ve been doing this for almost one year now and I have been enjoying this kind of job, or I would say this kind of “hobby”.
However something is rather strange tonight aside from my altered schedule caused by my stupid internet connection and the remarkable comfortable weather.
I am missing something.
Times of struggles are always breathtaking yet it takes a lot of courage to stand firm and move on. About 3 months ago, I have been wrestling with myself not knowing what I want to do with my life– to be precise, not knowing my DIRECTION.
I know what I want to be, but I don’t know how to be on track.
I know the things Im dying to do, but I don’t know how to start.
Where do I go from here and how can I go there?
These are the bizarre questions Im dwelling on for such a long time. Then come April.
I can still remember how I posted the status, “Looking forward to April 2011”. At that time I really don’t know why I am excited for April 2011. Is it because of summer or something more?
Then came March 31, 2011; the last day of MARCH 2011—also my last day at work. Then I realized this must be the thing I’m looking forward to. So prophetic, I can’t comprehend how it turned that way.
It’s April 1 and Im feeling like a student approaching her summer vacation. Finally the semester has ended!
Came April 7 and I wasn’t comfortable anymore. I am still wrestling with my thoughts and with my confusions. Where do I go from here and how can I go there?